вторник, 28 января 2014 г.

WHAT FOR?


When it is raining endlessly. When the sky died and is covered with gray clouds. When the wind is blowing in your pockets. When you are drinking the tenth cup of coffee and do not feel its taste. When the one you love, thinks you are nothing.  When you not sure any more if you have ever loved for real. When your dearest dies. When tears are coming down and you don’t want to keep them. When a gray kitten has no chances to avoid the car wheels. When a bird’s flight is cut short by a meaningless shot.  When you have to choose between bad and disgusting. When prosperity and status are made on children’s pain and tears. When you want to step on a narrow concrete strip that marks the roof off the abyss and make a step forward…Then, when you want it, here’s a desperate question - WHAT FOR?

What for is all of that? What for, if both love and hatred vanish the same way? What for, if all of us will die? What for, if everything in this world has money equivalent? And those who doubt it are fools, because they know nothing about this life. Everything around is vanity. All the plots have been written long time ago and even decorations of this specific life have been already used for somebody somewhere. There are so many of us on the planet that each of us is used by the civilization for 1 % at most. Millions of people live just to spoil air, water and soil, create several ones similar to them and eliminate a hundred - of different, but still alive ones. Or even similar ones.

Each moment civilization produces megatons of plastic, metal, chemicals and synthetic materials that will be a trend in some unnecessary industry right tomorrow, in order to give place to something different, newer, but, in fact, simply newly-mixed stuff the day after tomorrow.
Why do we launch space rockets, if we do not know what to do here – on the Earth? Why do we go to the churches with Good Friday face, if both churches and souls are abandoned long time ago? Whom for does this civilization of protein robots, who function in the framework of simple algorithms, exist? Mankind, what for do you devour TIME and SPACE?!!!

 To answer the questions, compiled from letters above, you don’t need to possess an extraordinary brain or God’s enlightenment…What you need is to realize that life is not just a form of existence and reproduction of proteins. It’s a complex of actions, feelings, impressions, deeds, touches, conditions, borders. Those are ups and downs. Spread out millions of kilometers of space, and feelings, compressed into a drop of pain. Breath of fresh air piercing each atom of your body. Billions of flaming worlds scattered high above your head. The rainbow that exists just a couple seconds and gives flashes of love carnival between the rays and the drops. It’s that kiss which matters more than sex and anything else. It’s that first touch of her – the one, the only, the sweetest in the Universe! Wild burst of emotions, hormones, touches, cramps, when it feels like a supernova explosion, and there’s no you and her, but a united body that is burning and reflecting. And this moment is worth dying in it.

Life… What it’s like without a taste of fresh baked bread? Without its crispy crust and the whole smell of warmth, that went through the field and wheat heads, hands and fire and into a little wonder… Warm milk flavour and wet eyes of a cow, looking at you. Smell of dew drops on the grass, the force filling your body through each leaf of knotgrass, with spicy breaths of wormwood and milfoil. You exist when melting in the maternal lap of the world ocean… When drinking freezing silver of the well water. When disappearing in the greenish abyss of the Dnipro waves.  When feeling as a half-brother to all those creatures, hidden in the blue blood of the sea.

 The sense of being on this small planet opens up when a child’s hand trustfully disappears in your palm. When eyes of your dear, dark and deep as the Kholodnyi Ravine springs, hold your caress. When your voice and your friends’ voices come as one song. When you breast the highest mountain and wipe your sweaty forehead with hands skinned to blood.  When you crawl through dirt and evil without knowing if there is a way out, but you don’t give up! When everybody thinks that you are doing wrong, but you do it your way.

 When nobody remembers anymore why we are here, and only you know that it’s a game. And when this life game is over and we all wake up one morning, once more we will realize and recollect something. Along those star-studded highways that our spaceship is ripping from nowhere to nowhere, there is no better mind game than life…